Thursday, September 8, 2011

Bappy Hirfday, Studly!

Yep!  It's Steve's birthday today!  He's thrilled.  I think his big plans involve coming home and collapsing with the remote and a pack of hunting shows that were DVRed all week.

At least until I drag him out to softball practice.

He only had one birthday request.  He wants a Tres Leche birthday cake.  Awesome!!


What's a tres leche cake?

Look, by now it's no secret that I'm about as domestic as a bulldozer.  So anything that requires more work than upending a premade mix into a bowl and tossing an egg or two in is waaaaay out of my realm of expertise.

No problem.  I can figure this out!


I headed off to Wallyworld yesterday to round up ingredients.  The first sign that I'm probably in trouble?  My 4 yr old was holding the computer printout of the recipe and "reading" things off the list.

Would you believe that tres leche cakes apparently have M&Ms, Oreos, and chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream in them?  Heather was absolutely insistant that they were all included in the recipe.

"See, Mom?  It says right there!  'M and Ms'!" 
"Hmmm... are you sure that doesn't say 'milk'?"
"Of course not!  I read it!  Look right here.  'M' and there's another 'M' over here.  M&Ms!"

And once that was announced Hunter was all over it.  "The M&Ms are over here, Mom!  Let's go get them!"


Eventually I found myself standing in front of the dairy section with the recipe in front of my nose and a thoroughly confused expression plastered all over my face.  The recipe calls for "whipping cream" in one part and "heavy cream" in another part.  Could I find "whipping cream" or "heavy cream"?  Not a chance.  All I saw was 4 or 5 different brands of "Heavy Whipping Cream".  No problem.  I'll call my friends who have all successfully raised full households without any food poisoning incidents. 

Hey, I've only had a couple... and my family still lets me cook.  Once in awhile.  When they're desperate.


Would you believe that not a single one of the people I tried to call was available right that second?  I mean, really.  Just because they have jobs and it was right smack in the middle of the afternoon on a Wednesday... that was no reason to not be waiting with bated breath for me to suddenly have a completely unimportant crisis to drop in their laps.  Honestly.  Some people.


So, I guessed and grabbed some stuff and we'll just wait and see what happens when Steve tries a piece of his cake this evening.

Of course a few hours later, when the work day ended, all those friends I'd pestered were finally able to get a breather and call back.  All at the same time.

My sister on one line, a friend on the other line, someone else called in and got routed directly to voicemail, Steve sent a text, and every one of them suddenly got hung up on when I had a typical Kiri moment and hit the wrong button which made my phone vomit and curl up in the fetal position.


Now it's time to get started on the cake experiment.  I'm assured it will all turn out just fine.

Although I'm still a little confused about how the ice cream and M&Ms are gonna handle being baked for 40 mins.

1 comment:

  1. You are such a great humor writer!! And as for the cake, PICTURES! I want PICTURES!!