Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Hunter!! Unlock this door or I'll...

*twitch*

Yeah, it's been a week.  For some reason I just haven't had much of any desire to be sitting on the computer for even a few minutes.  I've checked Facebook all of three times and one of those times was to try to find someone who seems to have dropped off the face of the planet since Friday evening.

Things have been pretty normal around here, actually.  Of course, by default, that means things have been very abnormal, cuz no one in this family is ever normal, so for things to be normal to us they'd have to be abnormal to everyone else.  Thus, normal for everyone else is most definitely NOT normal for us.

... if you followed that, you should probably be worried about your mental wellbeing.

Sarah's back in school so she doesn't get much at home time anymore.  Especially as I finally have my own vehicle and she discovered she now has built in transportation to all the afterschool activities she's been missing out on for the last five years.  Of course, being back in school means she's being inundated with classmates asking her to draw pictures for them.  She's begun accepting donations from the kids and at an average of a quarter a drawing, she's not doing too badly.

Yep.  My kid is making more money than I am these days.  I think I'm going to ask her for an allowance since I'm forced to do her laundry and feed her and such. 

Muwhahahahaa!

*cough*

Steve's on leave this week because he needs a break and has "Use it or lose it" time to burn.  So he's spent the entire weekend and the week so far running around town trying to find parts to fix our neighbor's car.  Today I'm gonna drag him around town so we can go grocery shopping, but I'm one of those people who can't just go to one store and get everything there.  We get our meat from the commissary, anything even remotely bulkish comes from Sam's club, sugary/bakery goodies come from Kroger, and pretty much everything else comes from whoever has the best prices.  They're building a Publix about 5 miles away and I'm chomping at the bit to see if they're as good as the one down near my Dad.

*reads over her babbling*

Dear God, I've been domesticated.

*twitch*

Anyway, this morning Heather came running into the kitchen asking if she could water the grass.  Since it's actually cooler than 90°, I didn't see any reason we couldn't go out in the yard for awhile.  So I found myself listening to the littles arguing over who got to dump the water into which kid-made mudhole while I tidied up the petunias in my pitiful little flowerbed. 

As usual I spent 90% of the time yanking weeds out of the ground, 5% of the time griping at myself when I accidentally pulled up something that should have stayed where it was, 4% of the time staring blankly at some green growth and desperately trying to convince myself I might actually know if it should be spared or not, and 1% of the time pulling dead leaves and blossoms off of the petunias.

That's me.  Gardener extraordinaire!

Eventually Hunter got bored with being ordered around by Heather and stalked back into the house.  As expected, I heard the deadbolt fall into place and calmly continued what I was doing while listening to Heather pound and push at the door while Hunter giggled maniacally from the other side. 

Then it happened.  The most dreaded ultimatum known to mankind issued forth from my darling 4 year old's mouth:

"HUNTER!!  Unlock this door or I'll ring the doorbell again!"

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