Thursday, August 4, 2011

Peace is overrated...

or obsolete. or pointless. or passively aggressive.

Depends on who you're dealing with I suppose.

For example:

This morning, little Hunter shouted at me from the bathroom "Mommy!  I'm making bubbles! Come look!"  I bolted into the bathroom fully expecting to see my child up to his knees in bubble bath. It didn't dawn on me that I never heard any water running until I rounded the corner and found the child standing on the toilet seat (with remarkably good balance, I might add) peeing into the water and getting the biggest kick out of the bubbles that kept appearing in the bowl.

Well, at least I don't need to spend money on Christmas gifts this year...

This afternoon, Sarah was taken to a friend's beauty shop to get her hair cut for school.  When she was all done and Crystal asked her if she liked it, Sarah tilted her head back and forth and kind of mumbled a little bit to herself before saying that no, she didn't really like it.  She got up and shook her hair out, then very carefully put it back EXACTLY the way Crystal had styled it and turned to us with a grin.  "That's better."

Crystal and I just looked at each other and silently took bets on which of us could kill the girl first.

Afterwards, it was time to make a quick jaunt to the store because I'd seen an advertisement for something called Granola Thins from Nature Valley and anything claiming to be healthy while having dark chocolate slathered on it is going to be purchased by me.  I told the kids that if they behaved themselves, I'd consider stopping at Dairy Queen before going home as a treat.  Heather promptly started grabbing everything on the shelves she could reach while reciting a steady monolog of "Can I have this? Can you buy me this? I want this. This looks good. Can we get this?" followed by miniature temper tantrums each time I said "No." and put said item back.  After 5 straight minutes of this, she finally let out a screech that made people around us jump out of their skin and demanded a box of cookies.  It was Hunter who turned on her with "We already have cookies at home, Heather!"  (What can I say?  The boy was faster than I was.)

I snarled out, "Why are you acting like this?!?" Heather calmly glared up at me and said as matter of factly as you could want, "Because I want ice cream!"


Well, now I'm home, sans ice cream, and had been looking forward to a quiet evening of the kids being exiled to their playroom while I spent some time on the internet relaxing before going to cross stitch.  My favorite message board was the first place I went to visit.  Usually I'm rather adept at avoiding the threads that are ticking down to their own little armageddons.

Today...  errm... not so lucky.  

Someone upset someone, who went to someone else, who charged in with blaring trumpets and upset a whole lot of someone elses, who brought in reinforcements, who called in more cavalry, who discovered the battlefield simply wasn't big enough and claimed more ground, which caught the attention of still more someone elses, who ....

I'd get popcorn and sack out to watch, but these gals would give a maximum security prison population a run for their money and I'm just not that interested in being a guinea pig for amatuer acupuncture.

Think I'll go take my chances with the 4 year old and her temper tantrums.

wait... I hear water running.  Oh no.  They've made a swimming pool for the Care Bears again.  The PLUSH Care Bears.

*twitch twitch twitch twitchtwitchtwitchtwitchtwitchtwitchtwitchtwitchtwitchtwitchtwitchtwitchtwitchtwitchtwitch*


  1. With the time difference I miss most of the implosions over on the stitching board LOL

  2. Hehe. I wouldn't be too upset about it. There are some threads on the board that I'll stumble into and actually hear my braincells committing suicide.

    These were those type of threads.